So people talking about you? Judging you? Making their own personal feelings clear through silence, or by discussing you with others?
Been there, seen it, done it. I think everyone has. Yet, it is no less painful to know that it is seemingly human nature; to comment on someone who has wronged you – most often because they hold a pattern of thought or a belief that is not compatible with your own.
It can be a difficult experience once feelings are shared and opinions are cast. It can split friendships and make group meetings an uncomfortable situation - that awkwardness of being in close proximity to someone you are at odds with or no longer on speaking terms with.
Most of the time, we are not even sure how we got to that point… and sometimes we are. Someone has taken exception to something that is normally connected strongly to the heart centre for either or both parties. It is very challenging to see another’s point of view when one feels wounded… feels their inner self is being inflicted by painful words, experiences or circumstances.
On the surface, It seems that asking others for advice, or attempting to initiate conversations to ‘smooth’ things out is the answer – yet, more often than not, this only perpetuates the topic and adds momentum to the subject matter, thereby increasing the energy around the issue even more… not really the desired affect huh?
So here’s the newsflash… what other people think about you or your actions is none of your business. Yes… not any of your concern at all! Sounds harsh but is actually quite freeing when you awaken to the fact you cannot change anyone's thoughts about you - likewise they cannot change yours. Knowing that, you can appreciate how futile it really is to attempt to force or bring about a change to someone else's viewpoint. You don't have to try to fix anything. This understanding moves you away from conflict and turns your attention to yourself.
Your real task here is to free yourself from the need to control or worry about another's feelings and emotions. Whether they be directed towards you or any anyone else, it is only ever their perception of reality which, (remember) is simply no concern of yours. The quicker you let any misguided thought pattern go about how they made you feel this way, or what you've done wrong, the better. They can only ever see their truth, through their filter. It will never be the same as yours 100 percent. No matter how close.
You, my friend, should look towards peace and reconciling any personal thoughts you have around the subject. Your feelings on the topic are controlled by you, not by circumstances. You always have a choice how to react. Just stay focused within yourself and what you actively choose to experience in your life by aligning with the greater energies of the universe... that ironically remind us of our connection to all things at our very essence.
It is again the joy of our experience in this physical body. The illusion of separateness that causes us to judge one another and see differences rather than similarities. Yet it is this contrast that brings us our experience of reality. Using our physical senses creates our reality by bringing feeling and emotions to our thoughts. It is the spiritual senses that remind us of our purpose and from where we came.
It is a balance that is necessary to really appreciate our own capacity within this lifetime. Not closed to the spiritual world, nor only operating with our head in the clouds, so much so, that we never focus it into this current reality and actually create.
Accept the contrast; the differing opinions, the likes and dislikes of yourself and others – then turn your attention to what it is you do want - for that is what all the uncomfortable, awkward or painful feelings are pointing you towards. That which makes you happy. Expansion.
Next time you feel that sinking feeling after interactions of a less than positive nature, simply acknowledge them, turn away from them and move forward on your journey… knowing clearly how you want to feel and how you’d rather not!